For a long time I did not update my blog, so thought I should write something....then I shattered my brain for ideas, didn't get any. Then I thought I should write one of my interesting topics "The art of teasing ppl" when I say teasing, I mean pulling legs not harassing or humiliating or hurting them. And these are some of the methods I applied on people and found them successful.
1. It is easy to tease who believe in god. Just make them feel that they are atheist. Blame them that they are not performing the rituals for the sake of god, its just show off. This will really irritate them. And try to use heavy words like "Bharateeaya samskruti sampradayalu" . No option left to them except being helpless even to retort.
2. Next category of people you can easily irritate is boozers. Say them at your face the you are a boozer, call them 'ore...tagubothoda'. Each time they met you, remind them that they are boozers. Whenever they say something, just say "Nenu taagubotolla maatalu nammanu raa". Make him a drunkard in front of others. Really teasing a boozer is real fun.
3. Pronounce their name many times, if possible their full name, before and after every sentence you speak. This will work with everyone, even with your mother ( I used to do that when I am a child). Say "Amma, aakalestondi amma, amma annama pettava amma, amma kitchen lo pedatava leka hall lo pedatava amma, amma em koora vandavamma, amma perugu leda amma" like that. Communication books says taht for every person their name is the sweetest one, so give them the same sweet in tons, after some time I am sure they feel like "Oh god, I will give you anything if he stops pronouncing my name, I cant hear my name these many times". Make sure that you pronounce their name with same modulation.
4. Repeat their catchy words. Some people have the habit of talking in low voice without seeing at your face. They are speaking to you. Even you listen what they spoke, if they are talking to you facing other side, ask them "Are you talking to your self or you are talking to me". Repeat the same whenever they are not facing towards you and talking.
5. Talk to them too affectionately. Make your words, modulation and body language so affectionate that they should run away from you. I tested it on my sister. Its a success. This method when mixed with repetitive name method will produce wonderful results. For example "Tinnava raji, tinava raji, enduku raji, ontlo baleda raji, doctore daggaraki veldama raji, nu tinakapothe naaku elano untundi raji, koncham anna tinu raji" like that. My sister is a very good victim.
6. Throwing sarcastic dialogs is something common in close friends. When you are chitchatting with your friends and someone bowls a sarcastic ball on another, tell the second person explicitly that the first one is insulting him. This will create an embarrassment in both the fellows. The second fellow will make a face and will say " I can understand this" and first will start defending himself and will say "No i am not being sarcastic" and finally both of them end up bickering.
7. Showing others their own mistakes will really piss them off. Even though they are so called open minded and ppl-who-can-accept-their-own-mistakes. Showing them their mistakes or analyzing their actions will really hurt their ego.
8. Speak in their own accent. With same modulation and similar words. At first they wont recognize it, but later they will understand. For that u need to observe their usage of words very carefully.
9.This one is a old one, i used it on my competitor in studies when i am in school. fortunately or unfortunately he become the class leader and as one of the duties of leader he was doing the job of writing the names of students who are disturbing the calmness of the class in absence of teacher. I used to sit in the last bench. I started giving him a big smile with lips closed without moving my gaze from him. I am not making any noise nor i am disturbing others from studying. I am not doing anything that can be called wrong. Just smiling with the constant gaze at him. He got irate, irritated he deliberately wish to write my name on the board and get me the punishments, but on what grounds? At last he asked me, why are smiling at me. I said nothing. He cant even complain to teacher. I really enjoyed teasing him, hitting him. Try this one, it will make others boil.
10. This one is on my friend in b.tech who is flirting with one of the young lecturer. I started writing poetry on them and i used to read the poetry while walking from bus stop to college everyday. After 7 to 8 such poems he stopped flirting with her in the class and one day came to my home to request me not to write such poetry anymore.
11. There are many methods like, lecturing ppl on the etiquette, morality , language and posing as a gnyan guru, giving them missed calls when they are deliberately waiting for the call from their date, giving a same smile each time there is an eye contact. When some one watching their fav actor/actress movie ask too many questions, like, is he the villain, what is he doing, why is he doing like that, why she is crying etc etc. If someone likes the old melodies sing the remix version of it including beats (make the beat music with mouth, du du dish , like that, this will irate them more). asking too many questions like what , why , how and where (Enduku , emiti and elaaa?) and be poetic while speaking or writing and make them get confused about what u are saying. Say that the other person is too good and u are very glad to have such a person as friend, say it in different ways, at different places and times, this will make them blush, or proud. If they felt proud about that they will say that to the common friend and then he will will say " antaledu....sanju ki vetakaram ekkuva..." that will spoil their mood. My friend is the victim for this. One more method is praising them a lot.
One of the cruel form of teasing is, giving others a book or movie after telling the suspense part. I was the victim of it. This will really irritates you, self experience guys.
You know one thing, after reading this post some of my victims want to kill me. To tease them i will make sure that they will read it. If u have any new ideas, share them guys, lets make this world a friendly place to live.
