Lets play it!!

I think it was Shakespeare who said something like all the world is a stage and we are the characters in it. I am not sure up to how much extent he was right!! And somebody said the world is a play ground. I agree to that. And do u know what the game we play in it. The most famous blame game!!

I know u must be smiling now. But its truth. I guess we start playing this game when we were in school. Each you get less marks in a subject and when our parents questioned about them we say "That teacher does not like me...she always mean to me" and when we grow and goto college and when we get less marks we throw the blame on the examiner by saying either the examiner corrected our answers sheets after having a fight with his spouse or with empty stomach.

After studies we will be entering a beautiful era called unemployment. If we observe the old movies there the hero says the interviewers was a scoundrel and already sold the job to someone so just for sake taking the interview he took it. We will never know what exactly happened. Now a days we throw the blame on our horoscopes, our stars and planets.

When we got a job and not performing well we complain on our boss who is not at all cooperating. If our peers got promoted, if he is a guy we would say "he is such a boot licker" or "he stole the credit for my work and got promoted". If its a girl " That pervert team leader likes her or else i would have got promoted" or " that bitch is going out with the manager, thats how she got it". To cover up our laziness to cast a vote we would say "does it matter if i give my vote or not, by this time somebody would have used mine, its waste of time to go and stand in the queue" and to cover up our guiltiness when we think the govt took a wrong decision and we didnt utilized our right we will say " i dont know why these illiterate 420's get elected to rule us, really politics are going dirty yaar".

Children blame parents for their financial stage and their education. Communists blame liberalism for every bad thing around us. We blame the govt for bumpy roads, hiding the fact that we didnt pay our taxes.

Dementors

Nobody understands me.
I am all alone in this world.
why dont i die.
my fate is like that.
God wants me to suffer I dont know why,
Nobody is there when I need one,
I am unfit to live,
They were not smiling happily.....they r mocking,
Nobody respects me,
Nobody listens me,
what did i do why u hate me so much,
why everybody hates me,
You people will be happy only after I die,
You made me suffer a lot...dont cry when i die,
Why did i born in the first place,
oooh god why dont you take me from this hell,
Cant u see how much work i have to do...and u dont have a heart to help me,
oooh dont bother dear..i am born to suffer,
I am the unlucky person on the earth, no one loves me,
They dont love me because i am ugly,
I never got what i want

Did those statements sound familier to you....usually they are used by dementors 'regularly' on their target. Many use these statements once or twise when they are in depression. But the case with dementors is different.

Do you know what dementors are? If not let me 'enlighten' you. they are the magical creatures who can 'suck' happiness and hope out of you. Cool huh? Not exactly.They can glide and used as prison gaurds. After all a prisoner will try to escape from the prison hoping that he wont get caugt and could live happily thereafter. When these creatures suck the hope and happiness from them the prisoners dont have any motive to escape. Though they appear first time in Harry potter series, later I observed that the author of the series might have created them keeping a certain kind of people in mind. They are the real dementors around us. They could neither glide nor appear in the black robes like the magical creatures do. But they could suck the happiness from you.

These are the persons who are never seem to be happy, never stop complaining about others and things. They have desires, at least they say so, but they wont try to fulfill them. They expect someone to do it for them. If someone did it they are happy. But their expression of happiness is diffrent from ours. When we are happy, we smile, we laugh in some cases we even jump. When they are not complaining about something you could make a guess that they are happy with it. Or there is another possibility ,may be thry are thinking hard on what to complain next!!

They give an impression that 'The whole world conspires to hurt them'.

No, no, dont think that i have included the ppl for those life is really hard...i was talking about the ppl who cry over little things like ...when the other person did not take the call or there is house-full board when they went to a movie. More importantly when the other person did not obey them.

If u have a rigid soul you might feel boredom if u are sensitive you will feel their depression...the worst happens when u start enjoying that depression and talking about it. In this way another dementor takes birth.

Interesting point to observe here is, u will come to know that a particular person is dementor, only after they choose u as target. They usually choose person who they love or whom they could influence. The struggle starts if your loved one is a dementor, you try to make them happy, ..and they deny to be happy. Sometimes its fun to observe how they could turn a positive situation into negetive and then start crying. They dont follow the one of hte simple rules of happy life " change what u cant accept and accept what you cant change'..they wont accept anything and they wont try to change them. Just like a happy person an unhappy person will always find a reason to be unhappy.

They chide about everything, ur shirt, room, ur behavior. Somehow they give an impression that they want you to be the best, so they start advising you....about everything. When you are tired of taking advises and explain them why cant you do something as advised ....they will get a reason to cry again...you dont follow their advice and u dont respect them. When you try to advise them they take it as criticism......you criticize them becoz you dont respect them..waaaaaaa

As far as i observed these people are hypocrites, confident (for aquitence) and supportive, The more you try to know them the more they seem to be getting into depression.

And dont think that they are not happy. They are happy by talking about unhappy things. My guess is , there are intellignet beings..their minds works faster..and when dont have the proper mind-work daily...so their mind become evil.

I think i found the thing u are looking for.....

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Well....as of now these are the sites i found useful....will keep u updated through this page!!!

Romancing with greif

Many said many things about grief. But just like love,friendship and fear its a feeling. You dont know it unless it creeps into your soul. It will make you bow. Each time you try to erase the memories which causes it, it will get strengthened. Try to ignore it, you still remember it. Then slowly you will see the cause of it around you, in day to day life. Suddenly you will develop a feeling that the whole world decided to remind the cause of it. You will get a doubt that, is the world mocking at me, i thought nobody knows about, how come the world knew it?

Finally I realized at the back of my mind that I cant keep on running from the memories. I had to surrender. I started to allow the grief to get sunk in my soul. The more in drowned in my heart the more I see the cause of it. And the reminder of the cause makes me restless. I become silent. Somehow I started enjoying it. I find the urge to talk about it with someone, but I had to get the control.

Its easy to beat a logic with emotion. But its damn hard to beat emotion with logic. We knew that the audience wont kill us if we made a mistake but still we get scared of being on stage. Its always hard to control an emotion. Blood pressure will rise when you are in emotion, especially a very powerful emotion, something like grief or a shock or fear. We feel the pressure at the heart. Its as if the blood is getting accumulated there. The chest area becomes heavy and we find it hard to breath. The funniest part is, this blood pressure made us to think that we feel with the heart and think with the mind. When we are sad, a deep sorrow, our body follows some mechanism which made the BP to go high, its just that. We feel and think in the mind. Heart does not contain any feelings except blood.

There are two affects of grief. One: you become silent, unresponsive for a period of time. You feel like something gripped your body so hard taht it become numb. Numbness is not a pleasure to enjoy all the time. Its a discomfort which makes the body senceless for sometime. The initial period is like that. You dont feel anything from outside, numbness makes the physical part to disfunction for sometime, grief has the same affect on your soul. You cant enjoy simple things in life, you get angry for simple reasons and the worst thing is you cant control your anger. Whenever you got hold of the emotion you become another person, you ignore the suggestions and warnings from your logical mind. You feel what you feel and what you do is the right thing to do at that time. When the emotion fades away and when the emotional and logical parts got the equilibrium you shall have the proper judgment.In this whole period grief is at the surface, its the garbage which blocks the way of rays of hope and happiness from the outside world to the bottom of your soul. The outside world would see the dirty surface and start judging you. Well, you cant blame, we usually believe what we see.

After this initial stage, slowly logical part will try to take hold of you, but still the emotional one is powerful. At this stage, we cant suppress our anger completely but we can choose on whom we can dump it. As a social person, I cant shout at people who are my acquitance and not-so-close friends. So we direct all the anger on the loved ones, thinking and feeling that they will understand our emotions and they can bare it.

For first few times it's okey for them. After that they will start thinking that, why the hell he is only angry at me? Does he love me any more? Why am i the scapegoat always, I love him, it doesnot mean them he can shout at me...I think we lost the connection between us. And the others will start revolting against you, and you will be confused and you will start getting the same doubt. I love them and I thought they loved me, cant they bare when i am mess?? Are they really the people I loved and believed? Does love means be with the person if and only if they are not-sad??. We cant blame them because we never did explain them what exactly happened.

Their revolt will add more grief. After being with it for a long time, I got boredom. I realized that I had to move on. I indulged myself into new hobbies, just keep my mind busy. I started enjoying the rock music with full sound. I keep the volume so high, hoping that the invisible sound waves from the speakers or from the earphones will clean my mind and soul. I started to pull my self, I started calling friends who I ignored in the initial stage. I dont want to be alone, I got an urge to speak to a good listener. Who listens me and keep me talking without giving me some advise or correcting me in the middle. I realized how much irritating when someone inturrepts when you are talking emotionally.

I did not find any. My relationships with the lost ones were not healed yet. Again I started thinking from others point of view and started hating myself for directing my anger on them. But i started living again.To keep the emotion part alive, I always need food for my mind . I would call this process, Moving!!! The dirty part from the surface is still going down, contaminating the whole emotional thing.

Now I become a sensible and logical human being again. But this time I am strong regarding handling emotions and more logical. My past relations are healing up. The dirty part settled at the bottom. Covering considerable area of bottom from outside light. The onlookers cant see it, only who dive in the lake may observe it. But I put up danger signs at the shore.

But anything which reminds me the cause of the grief, I will go back to stage one for some time. I tried to sink it further, so that it will be part of my life i.e everyday life and I need not respond to it emotionally.

As they say, everything happens for good, I learned a new lesson which i think and feel good. The lesson is you cant be logical to the people you love. You are emotional. You cant hide emotions from them. You cant deal with them just like you did with the collegue or acquittance. If you could do it....then the people around you are always happy.

Admire me!!!

For a long time I have been observing one thing in people that lot of them crave for either admiration or pity. I think that gives them the happiness of being important or great.

As we admire people who are greater than us, there are two ways to get admiration. Prove or at least say that you are better than others in certain areas. You could talk about the extra work u have done in the office (Eventhough its for ur own incentives wrap the fact with things "just doing a favor for my frnd" or "i am doing it becoz it helps the company to grow") or about ur past achievements like "I bowled Laxman many times while practicing, he says i am best the bowler compared to srinath (You probably met him once in LB Stadium while taking an autograph)" or "Mahesh babu used to copy my maths homework". We come across many ppl like that, in buses, in trains, mainly while traveling. Because when I am not going see ur face for second time, i could say whatever i want to say. This is type-1 of getting admiration from others, where you boast yourself about ur virtues, values u have, the achievements you have made (Does not matter, true or false) If you does not have anything to boast about yourself , praise your caste, religion, your skin color, the region you belong to ....etc etc

The type-2 method is a cruel one. In this method, you will degrade the otherperson so that you are relatively better than him, so you deserve admiration. This is theory of relativity. "You belong to lower caste, i belong to upper one so respect me, admire me because god has chosen me to give birth as uppercast fellow not you" or "oooh, dude, look at him he is black as coal, in the darkness you can only see his eyes n teeth" or "i am a man, as a lady you are weaker than me, so obey me, even Bharateeya samskruti sampradayalu supports me", "i belong to that religion which is better than yours".

If you have more area of land in your control then you are better than others. Might be this is the reason for half of the wars happened in the history. Alexander thought if he could conquer the world he would be the greatest of all in the world, deserving un-ending admiration Every religion claims that there is only one god, and that god or his son belongs their religion so other religions are without any god, so practicing them is waste of time. Jews thought christian philosophy is not right, after few centuries christians starting think that jews are burden to the world. Christrians (Extremists) claim that only their religion gives peace so get baptised, muslims (Extremists) think that rest of all religions are aginst god, so erase them, hindus(Extreamits) always think in vedas details about every techonlogy is written , thiers is the oldest civilization, as the stupid proverb goes, old is gold, thirs is best religion so every non-hindu must leave this country, dead or alive, or they should obey hindus n respect them.

Europeans thought having white skin is a great thing. They behaved with others as if having a black-skin is a sin. And we all know how colored people still struggling with that dogma.

I am working in an MNC so i am better than you as you are working for a domestic company. I am better than you, because i work in software , u work in non-software. I am better than you, because i am getting paid more than you.

Even the local political parties do the same thing, instead of talking about their own good qualities, they spend most of the time how rest of the parties are bad.

Cant we put an end to this? Cant to we treat the other person, in the same way we treat ourselves. Cant we eradicate the feeling of i-am-better-than-you. Cant we enjoy the equality even after school or college , where we enjoyed with our friends, freaking out and laughing with them irrespective of the academics or his/her family background? Lets give a thought about it.......